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Joke of the Day

Praetorius

Well-Known Member
An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%.

The elderly gentleman went back to the doctor a month later and the doctor said, "Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be pleased you can hear again."

The gentleman replied, "Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around listening to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!"
 

Super Catanian

Well-Known Member
Husband: Help, my wife's water broke, I think she's about to give birth!

Dispatcher: Please stay calm, sir. Is this her first child?

Husband: No this is her husband.

==========

Nurse: I'm here to deliver the baby.

Husband: Actually, we'd like him to keep his liver, thanks.
 

Super Catanian

Well-Known Member
Person: Doc, I'm terrified of random letters!

Doctor: You are?

Person: *(screaming)*

Doctor: Oh I see...

Person: *(screaming intensifies)*

==========

I knew a guy who had his innards completely rearranged, and later, removed. You could say he was... disorganized.
 
Sharing this from a friend in my guild for Mother's Day:

Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother’s Day morning. As she lay there looking forward to breakfast in bed, the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen. But after a good long wait she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs.
“As a surprise for Mother’s Day,” one explained, “We decided to cook our own breakfast.”
 

Snake Queen

Active Member
Sharing this from a friend in my guild for Mother's Day:

Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother’s Day morning. As she lay there looking forward to breakfast in bed, the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen. But after a good long wait she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs.
“As a surprise for Mother’s Day,” one explained, “We decided to cook our own breakfast.”
Good one!!
 

Praetorius

Well-Known Member
Who can drink 5 liters of gasoline and not get ill?

Jerry Can.

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