Let me be one of you!

Discussion in 'Guild Hall' started by Rhiki, Apr 22, 2017.

  1. Rhiki

    Rhiki New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2016
    I'm beginning to build a second city here on Brisgard and I'm looking for a guild to join. I'm no game God, mind you. But I help where I can and I play daily.

    Multiple times. Take that as you wish.

    I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award-winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I'll tread water for three days in a row.

    I woo men with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook Thirty-Minute Brownies in twenty minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.

    Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single-handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. I play bluegrass cello, I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries. When I'm bored, I build large suspension bridges in my yard. I enjoy urban hang gliding. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

    I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I don't perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number nine and have won the weekend passes. Last summer I toured New Jersey with a traveling centrifugal-force demonstration. I bat .400. My deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. Children trust me.

    I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and David Copperfield in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I have performed several covert operations for the CIA. I sleep once a week; when I do sleep, I sleep in a chair. While on vacation in Canada, I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who had seized a small bakery. The laws of physics do not apply to me.

    I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. I have won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open-heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.
     
  2. rostertag

    rostertag Active Member

    Joined:
    Feb 2, 2013
    Yeah, but can you fix the lag in FOE?
     
  3. Rhiki

    Rhiki New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2016
    Oh, dear heart. That's not lag. That's what happens when my majestic presence is recognized on the servers. It simply must slow itself down to accommodate the brilliant magnitude of my being.
     
    Stephen Longshanks likes this.
  4. Rhiki

    Rhiki New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2016
    My heart is breaking.....
     
  5. ardak kumerin

    ardak kumerin Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 21, 2016
    My lag cleared up.
    Just kidding.
     
    Rhiki likes this.
  6. amaranth the mighty

    amaranth the mighty Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2016
    Even I can't beat that boast. Think a lot of yourself do ya?
     
  7. Rhiki

    Rhiki New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2016
  8. hotirishstew

    hotirishstew New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2017
    Okay, so what can you REALLY bring to the guild?!
     
  9. ardak kumerin

    ardak kumerin Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    May 21, 2016
    86597d40b52dd5f1f491cb5017ae34b6.png

    I like @Rhiki 's writing.
     
    Rhiki likes this.
  10. Rhiki

    Rhiki New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2016

    Um....myself? Glamour? Attitude? Sarcasm?

    GLORIOUS BEAUTY!!!!!
     
  11. Rhiki

    Rhiki New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2016
    I've still not found a guild worthy of my magnitude. Maybe I need a different world. I should be on them ALL.....
     
  12. amaranth the mighty

    amaranth the mighty Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2016
    With that kind of attitude you never will. However, those of who are in guilds and share your high opinion of themselves had to suck it up and join. Take a look in your world and look at the guilds of one member that are out there.

    All of them also felt that there wasn't a guild out there that was worthy of their magnitude.
     
  13. Rhiki

    Rhiki New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2016
    hu·mor
    ˈ(h)yo͞omər/
    noun
    1. 1.
      the quality of being amusing or comic, especially as expressed in literature or speech.
      "his tales are full of humor"
      synonyms: comedy, comical aspect, funny side, fun, amusement, funniness, hilarity, jocularity;More
    2. 2.
      a mood or state of mind.
      "her good humor vanished"
      synonyms: mood, temper, disposition, temperament, nature, state of mind, frame of mind;
      spirits
      "his good humor was infectious"
    I'm not actually that cocky and narcissistic. I'm just humorous and sarcastic. That's who I am. If you want honesty, here you go.

    I'm a 39 year old mother of two. Both girls. I live in Ohio and I work at a Honda and GM supplier plant as a sous chef. Yes, you heard that right. I live with my fiancee and my best friend and we have a dog names Bronx. I am the first-generation American born child of Irish parents and when I get REALLY mad, you can hear the slight brogue in my voice. I donated a kidney to a man I didn't even know back in 2006 and I drive a Chevy Blazer. It's white and I have a Zombie Response Unit sticker on the back window. Anything else you wanna know, you gotta get me drunk first.
     
  14. amaranth the mighty

    amaranth the mighty Member

    Joined:
    Dec 31, 2016
    LOL That might be worth it and I knew you were being humorous and I was just playing around.
     
    Rhiki likes this.
  15. Nancy the merciful

    Nancy the merciful New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2018
    Well I for 1 would love to have you as a guildmate dear. Burgermeisters needs such a friendly and funny soul.
     
  16. m9silent12

    m9silent12 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2018
    Over a year ago was the last response. Pretty sure it didn't need to get reposted in. I'm hoping that they found a guild in that amount of time.

    What's so hard about looking at the date of the last post and then deciding NOT to post in incredibly old threads?

    You'd think it was quantum physics.
     

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